The King of Sports – Football’s Impact on America – Gregg Easterbrook (Thomas Dunne Books/St. Martin’s Press)

The concept of this book is a critical examination of the societal impact of professional and college football on the United States, conceived and penned by a global warming alarmist, scholar who toils as a fellow for the Fulbright Foundation and Brooking Institution think tanks and lays claim to watching “too much football.” What could possibly go wrong?

Easterbrook who has been dubbed “the thinking man’s John Madden” authored the “Tuesday Morning Quarterback” column for the uber-liberal, Slate.com and ESPN.com; that was noted for its snarky takedowns of football honchos and every level. Easterbrook’s more recent endeavors could lead you to wonder if Easterbrook would prefer the NFL become the professional flag football league.

 

 The King of Sports – Football’s Impact on America, starts out with a shocking love note to all things Virginia Tech football and coach Frank Beamer. Easterbrook opines on all that is holy about the Hokies program. If that was a way to set the tone for the rest of the book, it derails quickly.

Overall there is a disjointed, unconnected feel to the way this book is put together. Instead of coming off as a coherent, well balanced examination of the sport, ends up reading like a mixed bag of random columns that just don’t quite hang together. Can’t say I had high expectations going into this based on accolades from the likes of MS-LSD’s Chuck Todd.

Jason Who? NBA Player No One Has Heard of Announces He’s Gay

Okay, so there’s a big Sports Illustrated story and the media is blowing up with news that some guy that nobody has ever heard of has come out of the closet and announced he’s gay. To call Jason Collins marginal may give him too much credit.

In 12 seasons he’s played for half a dozen teams and averaged 3.6 points per game. We are talking about a 7 footer who averages less than 4 rebounds per game! Let’s face it, the NBA is SO desperate for big men that you can have absolutely NO GAME and still remain in the league.

So this makes me wonder why anyone should care? This is the equivalent of Bob the stock boy down at the local grocery store coming out! Other than the professional ax grinders and special interest groups does anyone who has get up and go to work every day really give two shits? Frankly it’s laughable to see tweets of support coming from Bill “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” Clinton and Kobe Bryant who let fly with a gay slur on court early this year.

Collins has managed to hang around with pitiful skills and stats to match for 12 years! Now he’s a free agents with slim prospects at best of landing on another team which makes this “big” announcement more than a little suspect. When Collins can’t find a new sucker willing to pay him big bucks to ride the bench then he will be able to claim that it was homophobia and not his crappy stats that caused him to not be able to latch on with a new team.

Newsflash! The Olympics Does Not Hand Out Participation Medals!

A first time Olympian, Tyler Clary ripped Olympic swimming legend Michael Phelps in an interview with Jim Alexander of the Press Enterprise (Riverside, CA) saying, "The fact that [Phelps] doesn't have to work as hard to get that done, it's a real shame. I think it's too bad. You see that all too often, where you get athletes that are incredibly talented that really take it for granted.”

Clary continued, "Basically, he was a swimmer that didn't want to be [at practice.] They can talk about all of these goals and plans and preparation they have. I saw it. I know. It's different. And I saw somebody that has basically been asking to get beat for the longest time."

Is this clown kidding me? Phelps broke the nearly unbreakable record of Mark Spitz, scoring 8 Golds in the last Olympics. Phelps has EARNED 54 medals in international competition…medals covered in GOLD, and this guy is whining that because Phelps is more talented and doesn’t have to work as hard, that he somehow didn’t earn what he’s won?!

Phelps crushed…yes crushed Clary by 1.5 seconds in the 200 Fly at the recent U.S. Olympic Trials…1.5 seconds is a lifetime in swimming. Clary harbors bitterness and jealousy of Phelps. His best international finishes; 400 IM silver medals at the 2009 and 2011 World Championships, were really made possible because Phelps chose not to swim those events. Phelps made his 400 IM return at trials and Clary got kicked down a step to third place and summarily off the Olympic team for the event.

I think it may go a bit deeper and trace its roots to the ridiculous mindset that we have created in this country where we try to level the playing field. We can’t keep score, because little Johnny will come to the realization that he’s just not as good has little Jimmy! After all…Johnny works hard and deserves a participation medal! And we wouldn’t want the kids to know the difference, so they should all be the same color!

Here’s a newsflash for Mr. Clary; Michael Phelps is flat out better than you! Get over it! You are on the U.S. Olympic team, so it’s likely that you’re a whole lot better at swimming than a whole lot of folks…you don’t hear them whining, do you? So STFU, because the Olympics doesn’t hand out participation medals!

Mark Titus- Don’t Put Me in Coach (Doubleday)

How can I best describe Don’t Put me in Coach?

Don’t Put me in Coach is Rudy for the South Park Generation…or A Season on the Brink with Beavis and Butthead. That’s close, but this book lacks the hero who works hard to overcome adversity and achieve his dream of playing a division 1 college sport and while there is references to occasional fisticuffs, no chairs were thrown by any crazed coaches.

The books parenthetical title sums it up; My Incredible NCAA Journey from the End of the Bench to the End of the Bench. Hardly inspirational stuff, though the so-called millennial generation may find Mark Titus’ success as a smart-ass blogger who chronicled his time as a walk on bench jockey at Ohio State amusing.

Clearly the goal of the book was not for Titus to wax poetically about the beauty of sport and the dedicated athletes who work hard to pursue championships as way to many blowhard sports writers have done over the years. Titus doesn’t spend a whole lot of time or ink worrying about trying to preserve relationships with his teammates; more often than not he set about trashing and bad mouthing the guys he played with.

It’s pretty clear that Titus was handed the golden ticket and his goal wasn’t to hone his game and crack the lineup, but to see exactly how far he could push the envelope or maybe the better analogy is, how hard he could push before his finger broke through the toilet paper.

Don’t Put Me In Coach ends up being a chronicle of a dysfunctional sports family…imagine your family’s Thanksgiving dinner, but with a bunch a really tall guys who spend way too much time together. There’s bound to be some laughs, someone is gonna get hurt and it’s no surprise when someone snaps and comes to blows.

As goofy as some of the stories are, they do ring true. That, and having crossed paths with him during my couple year stint working in the NBA Development League, I totally believe Titus’ story about his short time roommate Ivan Harris. But you’ll have to pick up the book to get the details!